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First to test each other's abilities and then to help me while I was, you know ... having a time.

[ extremely depressed is the right definition but he won't say it. He stays quiet at the explanation, however. ]

And eliminating Zodiark would not work, since you'd simply summon him again and, well. We already saw how disastrous the results of that are.

Ah...

[He reads between the lines but now is not the time to get sidetracked.]

Yes. And now you see the dilemma. To truly save our star we must be untempered, for no path involving Zodiark can save it. And yet to untemper us both would render us--I cannot even think too much, on all the things we have done, I have done--

[His voice breaks and he takes in air with a sob.]

It would break us, we would die long before any success could be achieved. Even if I could manage to weather this, Hades is unlikely to.

If you leave one untempered and the other not, that would also cause issues in the long term.

I know--I know there must be some way forward. But right now my mind is too muddled to see it. And should this affect be temporary--not only will I dismiss all these concerns, I will dismiss you bringing them up. I will have no other choice.

I can think of a solution but to be honest I don't like it, and neither will either of you, tempered or not.

[ but. If it is the only one that's actually feasible, maybe he will consider it ]

Altering your memories after time traveling. Give you just enough information and time to face the end of days before it happens, and allow you to find a different solution.

No.

I told you you would hate it.

[ but it'd still be better than an endless cycle of sacrifice and suffering. ]

I don't intend on just giving up on finding a solution. I've promised I'd do everything in my power to ensure you'd save you world and I intend to keep my word.

It isn't an option.

...I know. That is why I am telling you this. And I am sorry, too, because if I lose my will to Zodiark again I will not be of much help. I do not wish to have you laboring to save two worlds.

I would like to find some solution with you now, if at all possible. And yet it is difficult to think very clearly.

My world takes priority, but I do already have a solution for it. And helping you has likely given me a better chance at succeeding.

I don't think focusing on yours until I'm able to face my sister will be much of an issue.

[ But. It's true he doesn't have any solution now. ]

Altering the laws of your world to eliminate primals and make them impossible to summon might be a solution. And I imagine it's a wish we could have your enemies make. A suggestion here and there might suffice to plant the idea.

[He laughs softly.]

Are they my enemies, Five? As I am now I don't see them as such.

But you're right. Perhaps they would make such a wish. It would save them many headaches.

I am putting you in a difficult position though, all the same. Anything we come up with that prevents the summoning of Zodiark I will oppose should I be retempered. And Hades will as well of course. I do not want you in a position where you must choose between our world and our trust.

If you believe that's an acceptable and viable solution, ask Paloma to remove this conversation from your memories.

The rest, well ... I'll see how I can handle it.

No. I considered it but as I said. I will not keep secrets from Hades as mortals do, making plots around each other's backs like that will solve things.

Even if he cannot see eye-to-eye with this, he is still our dear friend. We will find a way together. Opposing each other even as far as secrets will not lead to any outcome but tragedy,

[ he's honestly relieved that he's disagreeing, and it shows. The last thing he wants to do now is conspiring against Hades when he knows exactly what a blow this whole mess was, and he's not entirely certain he'd be able to take on the burden without breaking his own heart in the process ]

He would not put his trust and faith on someone else's wish in either case.

But you're right.

Finding a way together is the best solution, regardless of tempering.

Edited 2020-08-10 00:12 (UTC)

[And that is why he cannot do that to either Hades or Five. There can be no conspiracy. There's been enough deceit and betrayal.]

Indeed. I cannot think exactly how we will manage it but... Somehow we must.

And it must be done together.

Then I suggest you share your current resolution with him. It might not be enough to sway him fully but I think he needs to hear your thoughts on it, while they're still your own.

I will. Yesterday was not the time.

And I needed to speak to you, without him getting upset while we talked.

But I will talk to him.

[Much as he hates the idea it must happen! He's so tired and wants to cry at all times but haha one has to just keep moving.

It'd be nice to be someone who could give in to despair and just lay flat on the floor and not move. It really would.]

In the meantime I am open to any questions you think of, day or night. I do not know how long my will shall be my own, but let us assume it is temporary for now and take advantage of it.

Oh a bright note at least we know untempering can be done.

[ he's going to run his hand through the back of his head and take a few moments before he sigh ]

To be honest I wouldn't know where to begin asking. But I'll try to think of anything that might be relevant.

It's good untempering can be done, but certainly not at the price you're paying for it.

[He gives Five a fond but tired look.]

This is just the price of opening my eyes after eons of blindness. There is nothing to be done but face it. I have been nothing short of a monster for more lifetimes than I would care to count.

I cannot undo that. Even what I still seek will unmake lives, unless we can somehow separate the timelines neatly--my very existence is selfishness, a relic of a long dead people who still fights a futile battle to see them again.

The price is quite cheap for all I have done and may yet still do.

[But he definitely finds himself loathsome and disgusting and there is no way around it except, well, tempering probably.]

[ he doesn't like hearing any of that. ]

You're not a monster. And it's not wrong for you to want to see those you love again.

Regardless of what it costs.

[He smiles but has no response. He is just going to drape his arm over his face and try not to cry again as he thinks of a topic that does not make him want to die quite so much.]

I liked your dream, by the way. For all the little imperfections it was truly warm.

Well. At least you had a happy ending somewhere.

Kind of funny that my father was dead in my perfect world as well, though. I suppose my mind could pretend he cared only if he wasn't actually present.

To be honest imagining him warm and loving is almost terrifying.

Terrifying in what way?

[His voice is gentle but not judgemental.]

In the if I ever saw it I'd imagine he was replaced by a demon sense.

[He snorts a soft laugh.]

A demon might have been warmer.

But part of you still wishes he had been so. That is not odd.

Maybe, but reality was what it was.

[ he sighs ]

And all I'm left with is the knowledge he was right and I was too arrogant to listen.

Is that really all you are left with? I grant you, you lack closure.

Well.

I can also distinctly hear his voice in my head telling me "I told you so".

Even if he weren't dead I'm not entirely sure how I would face him. And it doesn't matter anyway, because he'd hardly care.

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