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[ from here ]
going in and just sitting down on Vergil's bed, looking him over before he continues ]
My guess is that you don't want to allow yourself to accept people do care for you, because that might put expectations on you, and you don't believe you can meet them, which is scary. All the more so since you feel like if you don't, you'll find yourself alone again.
On a scale of one to ten how right am I?
going in and just sitting down on Vergil's bed, looking him over before he continues ]
My guess is that you don't want to allow yourself to accept people do care for you, because that might put expectations on you, and you don't believe you can meet them, which is scary. All the more so since you feel like if you don't, you'll find yourself alone again.
On a scale of one to ten how right am I?
...Nine.
You're just missing how I think it will make me weak.
You're just missing how I think it will make me weak.
Makes sense.
[ there's a pause as he tries to think over what he wants to say, because truth effect or not, this is fairly delicate ]
Caring about people doesn't make you weak, but it does open yourself up for vulnerability, which I understand feels just as bad. I mean. I started out here not wanting to have feelings or make friends at all for that exact reason, so it isn't as if I don't know how it feels - even taking aside my poor social skills.
But none of us has any expectation. Even if we did, I'm pretty sure you'd meet all of them.
[ there's a pause as he tries to think over what he wants to say, because truth effect or not, this is fairly delicate ]
Caring about people doesn't make you weak, but it does open yourself up for vulnerability, which I understand feels just as bad. I mean. I started out here not wanting to have feelings or make friends at all for that exact reason, so it isn't as if I don't know how it feels - even taking aside my poor social skills.
But none of us has any expectation. Even if we did, I'm pretty sure you'd meet all of them.
I know that objectively, at least. That's among the reasons I've grown so comfortable with you all.
As a demon, though, caring for anyone is only a liability. For both myself and them. Giving myself an easy way to be hurt and putting anyone close in danger like my father did to us. Having a human heart means loneliness, too, I'm sure you know that well. It's a feeling I'm trying to ignore, but that doesn't mean it isn't there.
As a demon, though, caring for anyone is only a liability. For both myself and them. Giving myself an easy way to be hurt and putting anyone close in danger like my father did to us. Having a human heart means loneliness, too, I'm sure you know that well. It's a feeling I'm trying to ignore, but that doesn't mean it isn't there.
I don't think you have to ignore it, necessarily. I'm pretty sure you'll never be able to fully get rid of it.
But do try to listen to that objective part of yours as well. If I ask you why you believe you love Lahabrea more than is advisable, will you be willing to answer?
But do try to listen to that objective part of yours as well. If I ask you why you believe you love Lahabrea more than is advisable, will you be willing to answer?
[He sighs.]
I'll save you asking. It's all of that, and that he's my friend so I don't need to be thinking anything more like some fool.
I'll save you asking. It's all of that, and that he's my friend so I don't need to be thinking anything more like some fool.
[He gives Five a look like seriously? But at least he's somewhat saved by not knowing how to phrase it anyway.]
As I said I'm trying not to have to know.
As I said I'm trying not to have to know.
Please. I'm a master of pretending I don't have feelings. I can ignore one if I want.
That's true, you are, with all that hugging. This is different though, no need to get excessive.
Always.
[He gives Five the biggest frown the world has ever seen. How dare he.]
[He gives Five the biggest frown the world has ever seen. How dare he.]
[Just because he has to say the truth doesn't mean he has to do it! So he's just sitting there looking grumpy.]
That's not happening.
That's not happening.
It is a good plan. I might glue my mouth shut.
[But. He presses his lips together. Is it more or less awkward if he doesn't hug him now, after hearing that.
This sucks. It's probably more awkward not to. So he turns to pull Five into a hug against his chest.]
[But. He presses his lips together. Is it more or less awkward if he doesn't hug him now, after hearing that.
This sucks. It's probably more awkward not to. So he turns to pull Five into a hug against his chest.]
[He does not need to return it that's fine. It only lasts a moment anyway.]
You said you wanted one.
You said you wanted one.
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